


Fly By Night

by DrawYourGunsR5



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Dirk as Miriam, F/F, Farah as Daphne, M/M, Todd as Harold, also Bart is a psychic and it's awesome, based on the musical Fly By Night, its a really good musical go listen to it, with some changes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 06:38:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14711012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrawYourGunsR5/pseuds/DrawYourGunsR5
Summary: The map of this story is both tiny and vast. And it is as simple and complex as choosing a path to travel and trusting it will connect to all other paths. A singing sandwich maker, a kick-ass body guard, a perky waiter, and a psychic. What could go wrong?





	1. Eternity

College was fun, for Dirk at least. He was the "I'll go to class when I feel like it" kind of guy. He still managed to graduate, somehow, and he was the best roommate Farah could have gotten. He was relatively clean, and was quiet when he needed to be. And by quiet, that means he would go find someone else to bother while she had to study. After growing up in England with no friends, he made it a point to stay on Farah's good side. It wasn't easy. The two would fight once in a while because; "You never show up to class! How did you pass the exam?" But Farah always got over it, because Dirk always promised to help her study for the next one.

After college they both decided Seattle was the next step for them. Well, Farah decided it was, Dirk just wanted to come along for a good time. So off they went to find some jobs and have some fun.

Dirk got on his feet a lot faster than he expected to. He found a great job at the local cafe. They served breakfast all day, and Dirk described it as the "best place in the USA." His simple line of "Refill? Great!" was all too easy. He got to know everyone that came through. He knew almost everyone in town, and if there was anyone he didn't know, he knew at least three people who did. Dirk felt like he was in the perfect place for him.

Strangely, it was harder for Farah to fall in love with the town. She could be any type of body guard or security guard or anything in that field, but no one was looking for one. So she settled for a job selling coats and shoes so she could at least help Dirk pay rent while she looked for something more suited for her. She didn't hate it, but she didn't love it as much as she wanted to.

Two blocks away from Dirk and Farah's apartment (but half a world away) Todd was scraping by. He had a lousy job at a sandwich shop with a boss he hated. When someone asked what came on his sandwiches he simply uttered "mayonnaise, meat, cheese, and lettuce” on repeat. He felt like a robot programmed to perform a routine. He wanted to be a singer/songwriter. The only problem was he couldn’t write a song even if Fate had slapped him in the face with a melody he'd sure fall in love with. His boss, Dorian, would just remind him about how unrealistic singing is and tell him he's just going to be stuck in his sandwich shop for all of eternity. Life at home wasn't too bad, however. He lived with a couple, Patrick and Catherine Spring, and their daughter, Lydia. Todd babysat Lydia when she was a baby. And when his homophobic parents found out he was bi and kicked him out, the Springs welcomed him into their house with open arms. He wasn't upset about it - his parents weren't that great anyway. He loved Patrick and Catherine. So, life was good. Or rather, it was as good as he thought it could be.

 

It was the day Dirk and Farah moved to Seattle that Catherine passed away. Lydia lost her mother, Todd lost a role model, Patrick lost his heart, and the world lost a ray of sunshine. It took Patrick a few months to go out again, and when he did, he took his favorite picture of her with him wherever he went so he could feel closer to her. And he did. On his first day back into the world, he went to a little cafe.

"Refill?"

Patrick nodded.

"Great!" Dirk began pouring the refill. "Are you new in town? I don't think I've seen you here before."

"Uh no, I've lived here my whole life. I just haven't been out in a while."

“Wait a minute!” Dirk sat in the seat across from the man he’d only ever heard about. “You’re Patrick Spring, aren’t you? I’ve heard a lot about you and Catherine. I’m so sorry to hear what happened, she sounded wonderful.”

“She is wonderful. Tell me, uh-”

“Oh! I‘m Dirk Gently. Pleasure to meet you.”

“Tell me, Dirk, do you believe in soulmates?”

Of course, Dirk said yes, because he does. And Patrick told him the greatest love story in the world. About their first date being a night he’ll never forget, and that being the night he knew he was with the one. Dirk marveled in the glow of a man so utterly in love. Patrick smiled, a real genuine smile, for the first time since Catherine’s passing. Talking about her made him feel a little closer to her.

“That was beautiful. And so romantic. You’re so lucky to have had that.”

Patrick chuckled. “I really was. Anyway, you should get back to work. I’m sorry to have bothered you. I must get going.” He stood up and began to leave.

“Uhm, Mr. Spring?”

Patrick turned around.

“Would you mind coming back tomorrow? I’d love to hear more.” Dirk inquired.

He nodded. “I’d love to. Thank you, Dirk.”

Patrick left, with a feeling in his heart that he missed. He looked forward to coming back.

 

Down the road, a strangely similar encounter occurred.

“TODD!” Dorian shouted as he came running into the sandwich shop.

“Yes, Dorian?” Todd mumbled in the most respectful tone he could conjure.

“What does that sign say, Todd? Read it! Tell me what it says!”

_ He saw it. _

“It says Sandwiches. Obviously. This is a sandwich shop. What else would it say?”

“Read. It. Again.” Dorian breathed way too harshly.

Todd took a deep breath and whispered. “Snadwiches.”

“SNADWICHES! Do we look like a  _ snadwich  _ shop to you, Todd!?”

“No.”

“No! Order a new sign and  _ don’t  _ mess it up this time!” Dorian shouted as he stomped off to his office.

Todd groaned and rested his face in his hands.

“Well he seems grumpy,” a soft voice whispered.

Todd looked up. Standing in the doorway way was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. She had wonderful curly dark hair that outlined her lovely face. Her brown skin seemed to glow so effortlessly in a way Todd had never seen before. Her beauty made Todd forget he was just being yelled at moments before.

“Who?”

“Your boss? He should give you a break. It’s not like you did it on purpose.”

_ Oh yeah. The sign. _ “I did do it on purpose.”

“Really? Why?”

“Because I hate him. And I don’t have the balls to quit so I’m hoping if I mess up enough he’ll fire me.”

“Think he will?”

“After  _ snadwishes _ , I’d say I have one foot out the door.”

The girl laughed, which was just as beautiful as the smile that accompanied it.

“What’s your name?” Todd asked before he could stop himself.

“Farah Black.”

“Farah Black.” He repeated. “Nice to meet you. I’m Todd Brotzman.”

“Well Todd Brotzman. Can I get a snadwich before I’m late to my first day of work?”

“Of course.”

As Todd made her sandwich they made quite small talk. She told him about how she would be selling coats and shoes. He told her about his bad luck with song writing.

“Alright. One snadwich for Farah Black.”

“Thanks. And I’ll be sure to write you a terrible review.” She said as she left.

Todd smiled.

And Farah went to work. She caught on to the job quickly - they had an aisle of coats and an aisle of shoes, it wasn’t like she had much to learn. She went on with her day thinking about Todd and thinking about how much more she wanted to be.


	2. More Than Just a Friend

_ Watch us live _

_ Watch us survive _

_ Watch us reach for the skies _

_ With the stars in our eyes _

_ Let us fear _

_ Let us fight _

_ Let us shine so bring _

_ With our wings we take flight _

_ We may be human _

_ But we can fly _

_ Hold my hand _

_ Because we’re alive _

_ We may be human _

_ But we can fly _

 

Farah gripped her phone tighter as she reread the words Todd had written down on a napkin from his work. “Todd, you wrote a song!”

“Well, I wrote two and a half verses. But it’s a start!”

“It’s a wonderful start. I’m so proud of you!” She took a deep breath. “Can I ask what your inspiration was for it?”

Todd fiddled with his pen then switched his phone from one ear to the other as he nervously worked up the courage to say; “You.”

“Oh,” Farah blushed. “Thanks.”

“Farah?”

“Yes?” Her voice became a pillar of hope.

“I think I like you,” Todd confessed.

Farah’s heart skipped a beat. “I think I like you, too.”

“No, I mean, I really like you. As in, more than a friend.”

She laughed lightly, “I know.”

It took a moment before either of them could say anything. They sat in a not-too-awkward silence until-

“Todd?”

“Yes?” His voice now echoing her previous hope.

“What are you doing tonight?”

Todd thought for a moment. “Oh, I don’t know. I was thinking about reading a book.”

“Oh,” she breathed. “Well, I was just thinking that if you want something you have to just go for it, right? No hesitation.”

“Right. Good point.” He agreed.

“So…?”

“So I  _ will _ read that book tonight. Thanks Farah!”

“Wait! That’s not exactly what I meant.”

“Oh, what did you mean then?”

“Uh,” she cleared her throat. “Do you think maybe your book could wait while you and I go out together?”

“Go out together? Like on a date?” He questioned.

“Yes. On a date. You and me. How does that sound?”

“That sounds amazing!”

So they went on their date. And yes, it was amazing, naturally. This is a love story after all. They walked around the town, looking at the beautiful Christmas lights and decorations. They talked all night about their lives and their dreams. It was one of those nights that lasts forever. The kind of night you fall in love with.

 

And while the world was changing around Farah every second, the universe stood still for Dirk. Nothing seemed to change. He was still working at the Greasy Spoon Cafe, repeating “Refill? Great!” for every customer, Patrick came in every couple of days, and it was good. He never complained, he never wanted to. He loved it. Saturday's were his day off, and today being Saturday, and Farah being busy with her new boy toy, Dirk took the day to himself. He could use a new jacket, so he walked around town looking for a shop that looked intriguing enough to go inside.

 

_ “I can’t wait for you to meet him!” _ read Farah’s text.

 

Dirk smiled at her joy that he could feel from miles away. He really was happy for her and her new boyfriend. What was his name? Tom? Timmy? Oh, well. That doesn’t matter. What matters was that his best friend was happy. So he was happy, too, right? They had been together for three months now, and she was thriving. She came home smiling everyday because they would walk together from work to his home. Dirk was so happy for her. Too happy. That’s what those tears were, right? Happy tears for his best friend who is so incredibly happy.

No, he couldn’t lie to himself anymore. He wasn’t as happy as he pretended to be. Of course, he wasn’t sad either. He really did love his job and his home and his friends. But that didn’t stop his tears from falling. Sometimes he was lonely. Farah was off with That Tim Guy whenever she wasn’t working, leaving Dirk alone. And he knew just because he was alone doesn’t mean he’s lonely, but he wished for a love that Farah was lucky enough to find. He often thought about who his soulmate would be and how he would meet him. He always imagined he’d be at some cafe and he’d look up and see him and just  _ know _ . That feeling in his chest would happen and he would know. That would be him and they would be happy. But that never happened. Of course not. And he was over thinking it all.

He took a deep breath and wiped his tears away. He continued walking. And he found himself walking into a little shop, with purple sequins on the sign and a big red door that seemed way too hard to open. Because the feeling in his chest happened, and he felt like that was where he had to go.

“Hello?” Shouted an old gravelly voice from the back of the building.

“Hello?” Dirk whispered too quiet for anyone to hear. He looked around the strange shop. It was dimly lit, and everything in the room was tinted in dark reds and blues. Beads hug from the ceiling and clung to the walls. There were only two doors, the heavy exit and an open doorway with lavender strings acting as a door. The only thing in the room was an awkwardly green table with two chairs. There was a weird feeling to the room. It made Dirk feel… safe.

A young woman, Dirk’s age, came walking through the lavender strings.

“Ah, Hello.” Dirk greeted as he saw her emerge.

“Bart,” said the woman. Her voice matched the one the greeted him when he first walked it. It was weird, she looked too young to have a voice sound that old.

“‘Scuse?”

“Tha’s my name. Bart. I’m introducing myself. Geez have you never met another person before?” She almost had an accent. Dirk couldn’t tell exactly where she was from. Everywhere, probably.

“Oh. Right. I’m Dirk. Nice to meet you.” He held out his hand for her to shake but instead she took his hand to examine it.

“Do you mind? What are you doing?”

“I’m reading your palm? I’m a psychic. It’s what I do, you haven’t noticed?”

Dirk pulled his hand away from this Bart character. “Thank you, Bart, but I don’t need my palm  _ psychiced _ . I think I should be going now.”

Dirk turned to walk out the door. That safe feeling was long gone.

“Somethin’ told you to come here.”

Dirk froze.

She continued. “People don’t jus’ walk into a psych shop without wanting to get ‘psychiced’ so wha’s your deal? You a psychic too or somethin’? I’ve never seen you at the meetings,” she laughed.

“What do you mean? I’m not a psychic I’m just a normal man, a very normal man.”

“So why are you here?”

Dirk gulped. What a good question. Why was he here? “Hunch?”

She pointed at one of the chairs at the table. “Sit.”

Dirk didn’t have it in him to argue. He sat.

“Wait there.” She mumbled and crawled into the back. She came back in a few second holding a large glass sphere.

_ Now she’s starting to look like a psychic, _ Dirk thought.

“Right. Give me your hands,” she demanded after placing the ball on the middle of the table and sprawling out in the chair across from Dirk.

Hesitantly, Dirk placed his hand on the table, palms up for the psychic.   


“You’re so bad at this,” she grumbled and flipped his hand over so his palms were on the table. “Have you never seen a movie before?”

Dirk swallowed the lump in his throat. “Not many, no.”

“Okay. Close your eyes.”

So he did.

It was a few minutes before anything else happened. Dirk felt Bart’s hands on top of his the whole time. She wasn’t making any sound, and probably no movement. Dirk was tempted to open his eyes a couple of times but he was too afraid of what would happen if the psychic caught him. He was starting to feel relaxed. He could almost fall asleep.

“That’ll be five dollarz.” She stated and removed her hands from Dirk’s.

“What? Aren’t you supposed to tell me my future?”

“I’ll tell you your future when I know there’s food in mine. Five dollarz.” She held out her hand waiting for the money.

Dirk sighed. He pulled out his wallet and stuck a five dollar bill in the psychic’s hand.

“You’re gonna meet your soulmate very soon. She is-  _ oh _ .” She stopped to grab Dirk’s hand again. “Ah,  _ he _ is going to surprise you.”

“My soulmate?” Dirk breathed. “Who is he?”

“I can’t tell you that.”

“Well, how will I know it’s him?”

She leaned in closer to the ball and hummed. “I’m seeing three signs.” 

“What are they?”

“The first one comes in the form of a question; what does it look like when time stops?”

“What does it look like when time stops?” Dirk repeated.

“I don’t know! But somehow you’ll know.”

Dirk took a deep breath. “Okay. What’s next?”

“The next clue is a number. 527!”

“527? What do they mean?”

Bart shrugged. “Oh and the third... the third is coming to me in a melody.” She smiled and hummed a short tune.

Dirk hummed it back.

“What does that all mean?”

“I don’t know! But somehow you’ll know.”

Dirk sighed. “Okay so I’m going to meet my soulmate. Do you know when?”

“Soon, I suppose. I wouldn’t be able to sense it if it wasn’t happening soon.”

“Can’t the ball tell you more?” Dirk begged.

“The ball? No, I don’t use that thing. I bought it for 30 cents from a goodwill, everything I see comes from the universe, not a stupid ball.”

“Then why do you have it?”

“Aesthetic, whatever that means. I don’t know, my friend Ken said I should have one. Anyway, tha’s all. You can leave now.”

“Oh okay. Thank you, Bart. You’ve been a big help.”

“Help? You didn’t even want to come here. What did I help?”

Dirk shrugged. “I just feel better, that’s all. Knowing there’s someone out there me, it’s nice.”

Bart rolled her eyes. “What is it with all this romance. It’s gross. Now leave before I get sick o’ you.”

Dirk chuckled and left. He walked back home with his head held high. He felt a little silly for crying earlier. Really what was the reason for it? He’s got a soulmate. His perfect match. His one true love. There is someone out there for him. And Dirk was determined to find him.


	3. Pulled Apart

Interview after interview. No one wanted to hire Farah. She wasn’t sure if it was because she was black, or a woman, or both. No - people weren’t that awful - she hoped. It had to be because she wasn’t good enough. Not enough experience, right? She really hasn’t done much in the field she’s looking in. Hell, she went to school for business management. Maybe she should just open a bakery with Dirk and Todd. The three of them could bake cake for the rest of their lives. Yeah, that’ll be fun for ten minutes. Until Dirk burns the whole place down. No, Farah can’t do that. She’d be doing the same thing everyday. She’d get bored. That’s why she wanted to be a bodyguard. She’d be doing something different everyday. That’s what her father did. He taught her everything she needed to know. She went through training throughout high school. It’s what she really wanted to do. Why couldn’t she? She knew she was good at it. So what was the problem? Was she so much of a mess that no one could see her as intimidating? Did people realize that she can’t keep her own life together and think she can’t protect them either? They were probably right.

"Farah, you have to keep trying.” Dirk encouraged.

“How? Who’s going to want me? I’m a mess of a person and people pick up on that. No one wants me.” She sighed.

“Don’t tell me you’re giving up. You’ve only applied to like 30… million places.”

“Maybe I should try something else,” Farah suggested.

“Well you have to apply somewhere, I think the job of your dreams is a great place to start.”

She sighed, “Look, it’s late, let’s just find a different career for me in the morning.”

“You gain nothing from giving up, Farah.”

“Oh, don’t start with all the zen master stuff. Okay? It worked a lot better before I figured out you were a mess too.”

“Fair point. I suppose. But wouldn’t it just be one more thing you walked away from? You know, I was thinking about life and how you go through it. With jobs and school and tests and how it’s always one after another until eventually one of them kills you,” Dirk rambled.

“Yeah, that’s dark and depressing.”

“Well, giving up is an answer I suppose. As it’d certainly be easier, but it’s an easy road to nowhere. What if one more application is all it would take?”

“Go ahead, one more, and then we quit.”

“Nah, you’re right, Farah. Let’s move back to Kansas and be farmers. Come on.”

“Wait no. One more, just to prove me wrong.”

“No. When you’re right, you’re right. And you’re right. Let’s quit.”

“You wanna try one more, try one more.”

“Look, all I was saying is if you don’t try you’ll never know.”

“I get it! But now I can’t quit.” Farah groaned and grabbed her laptop. She typed a few things in and hit SUBMIT into the computer then set it back on the table in front of her and Dirk.

“There, now don’t you feel better?”

“I hate you. And if this turns into something, I’ll hate you even more,” Farah teased.

“I have a good feeling about this one.” And Dirk’s feeling wasn’t wrong. The next day, Farah got a call from one Amanda Storms. And she had an interview that afternoon. Dirk wished her good luck by attempting to make her breakfast. It was a failed attempt, but his heart was in the right place. Todd sent her a kissy face emoji text. And Farah gave herself a pep talk in the bathroom mirror. This wasn’t her first interview, but it was the first one she felt really good about. She just wished that was a good sign.

She went to the interview with her head held high. When she walked into the room and saw Amanda, she was taken slightly aback. She was an adorable, punk-rock, beauty girl. She was slightly shorter than Farah, but stood as if she held six feet on her. She had black hair that was clear she dyed regularly, but it still look really good. Her dark eyes made it look like she could shoot someone down in seconds. As intimidating as she is, she was too interesting to be afraid of.

“Hi! I’m Amanda. You want a job?”

Farah nodded nervously, “Yes. I do.”

Amanda leaned against the desk and took a deep breath before asking, “You know who I am?”

“Amanda Storms. Aspiring actress.”

“Actor.” She corrected. “You say ‘aspiring actress’ and it just sounds like I’m a girl who’s trying too hard and not getting anywhere.”

“Okay, Amanda Storms, actor.”

“Yes, that sounds so much better. Actor Amanda Storms. Taking the screen by - well - storm. And I want you by my side.”

“Really? I don’t know anything about acting. I’m just-”

“A bodyguard. That’s what I need.”

“It is?” Amanda shrugged.

“I have severe paranoia and anxiety. Without a muse, I can hardly leave my house. How is someone going to be an actress when they can’t leave their own house? So tell me Farah, can I trust you?”

Farah smiled. “You’ve got yourself a muse.”

They talked a little while longer together about scheduling and what-not. Needless to say, Farah got the job. It felt like a dream. As soon as she was finished at Amanda’s she ran to Todd’s apartment, which was only a block away. She pounded on the door for only a second before Todd opened it.

“How’d it go?!”

“I got the job!” She cheered.

Todd laughed with pride and hugged his girlfriend. And he said the only words that popped into his head in the moment. “Will you marry me?"

And Farah knew what he answer should be, but with the excitement in her veins she could only give him the wrong answer. “Yes!”

“Tonight. We’ll celebrate. Invite Dirk. I think it’s time I meet him.”

_Let’s get dinner tonight. Greasy Spoon at 6. I want you to meet him tonight._

Dirk laughed at the text from Farah and responded with, _Finally!_

_Big news to come!_

Dirk hoped it was that she got the job. He pushed her to apply for it. So if she didn’t get it he would feel partly guilty. She hated her job selling coats and shoes. She could do more. Dirk wished she finally got it. She deserved it.

“Dirk!” A gravelly voice from behind him shouted.

Dirk turned around. “Ah, Bart. Hello.” It was the psychic from last week. Dirk hadn’t noticed he was in the same neighborhood again.

“I was hopin’ you’d come through here. I have some’in’ to tell you.”

“What’s that?” Dirk asked.

“It’s tonight.” Bart whistered.

“What’s tonight?”

“You meeting your soulmate. Obviously. What else? You’ll be meeting him tonight so put on a clean shirt or some’in’.”

Tonight. Dirk was meeting him tonight. _Him_. As Dirk got ready for dinner with Farah, he wondered about who else he’d be meeting tonight. He let his mind wonder until he walked into the Greasy Spoon at 6 o’clock. He looked around. They were packed. No sign of Farah and the boy anywhere. And nowhere to sit. Luckily, he was a talker. And he found a cute boy sitting alone in the back of the cafe.

“‘Scuse? This seat taken?” Dirk asked the guy. He was a little nervous. What if this was him?

“Oh, I’m actually waiting for someone.”

“So am I! Shall we wait together?”

“Why not? Go ahead.”

Dirk sat down across from the man he’d never met. “I’ve never seen you here before. Do you live away from here?” Dirk pondered. His heart pounded so hard he was afraid the other man could hear it.

“No, I live in town. I just don’t come here often. My almost dad comes here a lot, though.”

“Almost dad?”

The other man laughed. “That’s what I call Patrick. Him and his wife took me in when my parents kicked me out.”

“Patrick Spring? You must be Todd.”

“I am. You know Patrick?”

“I work here. He comes in a lot. He always tells me about Catherine. He’s talked about you a couple times.”

Todd smiled. “That’s really nice. I’m glad he has the company. He’s been lonely since Catherine passed away.”

“Haven’t you been with him?”

“I’ve tried.” Todd sighed. “But he ends up pushing me away. Lydia is over seas right now, she’s not able to come home, so I think he’s just too afraid to be close with anyone right now.”

“Keep trying. Grief is weird. He’ll get there.”

Todd nodded.

Dirk cleared his throat. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“This is going to sound weird but,” he laughed nervously and leaned in a little closer to Todd. “What does it look like when time stops?”

Todd shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe something like-“ he bent his arms as if he were about to run off and froze - as if time had stopped.

Dirk laughed. So did Todd.

Funny, caring, and attractive. Dirk wouldn’t complain if this was his soulmate.

“Okay so it’s my turn.”

Dirk nodded.

“Why’d you sit with me?”

“Hunch?”

“You’re supposed to say you didn’t have anywhere else to sit.”

Dirk shrugged. “I work here. I could sit where ever I want. You’re cute and alone. So I picked you.”

Todd blushed slightly. “Thanks?”

“My turn,” Dirk sat up a little taller. “Do the numbers 527 mean anything to you?”

“527?” Todd thought. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Oh, okay.” But that doesn’t mean that he’s not his soulmate, right? Maybe the number are important later. “It’s your turn.”

“What’s with all the questions?”

“Oh, it’s stupid,” Dirk scoffed.

“Tell me.” He sighed.

“A psychic told me I would meet my soulmate tonight. She gave me three clues so I would know who he is.”

“Three clues. What’s the third?”

Dirk was about to call him out on asking a question out of turn, but his next question was going to be about the third clue anyway. “It’s a little melody.” He sang the short tune for Todd.

Todd hummed it back. “I like that. I’ve never heard it before. But it’s catchy. I might have to use it.”

Dirk’s face turned a bright red. “You definitely should. Credits to Bart Curlish.”

Todd laughed. “I’ll be sure to thank her. You said the clues where to find your soulmate, right?”

Dirk nodded.

“Look, you seem like a nice guy but the chances of me being your soulmate are slim. I’m sorry.”

Dirk grimaced. “You’re not straight are you?”

A nervous laugh escaped Todd’s lips. “No, I’m bi, but I’m also-”

“There you guys are! Sorry I’m late,” Farah announced as she walked in to the no-empty cafe. “Oh, I see you’ve already met.”

“Hm?” Dirk hummed.

“Okay, maybe without introduction. Todd, this is Dirk. Dirk, this is Todd. My fiance!”

“You- you’re engaged?”

“Gee, I thought you’d be more excited for me.”

“Sorry,” Dirk breathed. “I am! Yes. Congratulations!”

“You’re Dirk Gently?” Todd whispered.

“Ha. Guilty.” Todd took a deep breathe.

“Wow.”

“Yeah.”

“What’s going on?” Farah asked. “You two look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Nothing. It’s fine.” Todd muttered.

Dirk cleared his throat. “So when’s the wedding?”

“We just got engaged five hours ago.”

“Oh well clearly you don’t know Farah. She probably already knows what band will play.”

“We’re getting a DJ,” Farah corrected. “His name is Bobby and the wedding is on May 27.”

“ _May_ 27?” Dirk choked.

“That’s 527,” breathed Todd.

“I gotta go!” Dirk snapped. “I’m sorry. It was nice meeting you, Todd. Congratulations to you both. You’re both lucky. I have to go.” Dirk pushed passed Farah and ran out the door of the cafe. Once he was outside he stopped to breathe. And think. How could this have happened? Is the universe so cruel that it would connect him with his best friend’s fiance? Is the only person in the world that’s capable of loving him, someone that’s already in love with someone else?

“Dirk!” A voice called.

Dirk turned around. “I’m sorry, Todd. I shouldn’t have told you all that. Now I’ve complicated everything over some $5 psychic. I’m sorry. It was stupid.”

Todd walked up to Dirk. “No, it’s not stupid. I should have told you I was with Farah as soon as you called me cute. That was just a lapse in judgment there. I wish I could tell you I’d give you a chance - but I can’t. You understand why. You’re a cute guy Dirk. Your real soulmate is out there somewhere. I promise.”

Dirk nodded. “Thank you. But I have to go. I’ve embarrassed myself enough for one night. I’ll see you around. Tell Farah I’ll see her at home.”

“Okay.” Todd walked back inside as Dirk started walking toward home.

It was a weird night and an even weirder month. Farah was working all day everyday. She hardly had time for Dirk or Todd. It seemed like Dirk saw Todd more than Farah - as Todd would come over a lot to help Dirk with the wedding planning. It was fun at times. But it was hard. Dirk enjoyed the time with Todd. But helping him plan his wedding was the hardest thing he had to do - even harder after he had the dream where it was finally the wedding, and it was him and Todd getting married. It was easy at first to pretend there was nothing going on. But then there was the kiss. Dirk accidentally kissed Todd. It was fast and short and only happened because Dirk was slightly drunk and wasn’t thinking. It ended faster than it started. But after that, everything was too weird, and Todd felt it too. So Dirk did the one thing he knew how to do. He panicked. And left.


	4. Fly By Night

A month. Dirk had been gone for a month. Back to living with his parents. He hadn’t spoken to Farah since he left. What was he going to say? “I fell in love with your finance and kissed him and now I can’t breath when I think about him”? Yeah. That’s worse than ghosting her. He didn’t even say goodbye. He just wrote a note that said, “Have to go home. Things messed up. Not your fault. Shit. Dirk Gently.”

And he was gone.

But today was the day before the wedding. And he has to be there for his best friend.

Tomorrow is going to suck without you. Farah had texted him that morning.

He didn’t respond. He couldn’t. He didn’t have service on the train.

Todd missed Dirk too. But he left he wasn’t allowed to think of Dirk. It made his chest hurt with guilt. What happened was his fault, wasn’t it? He never should have let Dirk fall in love with him. And he never should have fallen in love with dirk. But he did. And now he has to find him.

Maybe it was luck that pushed them together. Maybe fate. Maybe it was what Dirk would call a “rarer, sexier, coinkydink.” But when Dirk stepped off the train, he saw the last person he’d expect but the first person to make him happy.

“Dirk!” Todd shouted. “You’re here!”

Dirk’s stomach flipped. There he was. He ran toward Todd and leapt into his arms.

“I missed you so much,” Todd whispered to Dirk.

Dirk could only breath and he was still doing a bad job at that. When they pulled away Todd had to fight everything in him to not kiss Dirk again. That’s what got them into this mess in the first place.

“What are you doing here?”

“I had to come to the wedding. I spent so much time planning it.”

Todd’s face fell. “Oh, Farah didn’t tell you?”

Dirk eyes got sadder but his smile wouldn’t falter. “Tell me what?”

“We broke up.”

That’s when his smile disappeared. Was that his fault? Did Farah think that Todd cheated on her? Did he mess everything up again?

“It wasn’t your fault.” Could Todd read his mind? “After you left, we both realized that while we do love each other it just wasn’t enough. We weren’t in love. She fell for her new boss, Amanda. And I’ve been here. Waiting.”

“Waiting for...?”

“You.”

Dirk looked down. “Oh.”

“You didn’t have to leave,” Todd said softly.

“Yes I did. It would have been so complicated if I hadn’t. You and Farah weren’t supposed to break up. I’ve messed it all up. I’m sorry.”

“Dirk look at me.”

Dirk hesitantly raised his head to look at Todd.

“None of this is your fault. Okay? It was an adult choice that Farah and I made together. It would have happened either way. We just weren’t happy the way we were supposed to be. If anything, it’s good.”

“You guys aren’t mad at me?”

“Not even a little. Mostly just worried.”

“Does she know? About the kiss?”

Todd shook his head. “I couldn’t tell her.”

Dirk nodded and took a deep breath. “What now?”

“Go on a date with me,” Todd proposed.

“What?”

“Please?” He begged.

“Todd, I can’t do that to Farah.”

“You wouldn’t be. Look, I ran into Bart while you were gone. She said there was no way to avoid how we feel, so why try to? You told me we were soulmates, Dirk. Please, just give me one date. We can decide what to do after that.”

Dirk gulped. He knew that going on this date could hurt Farah, but with every fiber of his being, he just wanted to be with Todd. “Okay. One date.”

They walked out of the train station, holding hands without realizing. They walked toward the Greasy Spoon.

“So can I ask what you were doing at the train station?” Dirk asked.

Todd cleared his throat. “I was going to go find you. Lucky we caught each other.”

“Yeah. Lucky.”

There was a strange feeling in the air that night. It was warm and familiar. It felt like it was going to rain, but in the sky there were only stars and no clouds. It was fantastic - as if the universe was smiling at them - a flickering fly by night sight. Dirk could feel the worlds aligning when he looked at Todd. It felt like time was going to stop.

They reached the Greasy Spoon, where Dirk’s friends were happy to see him. They sat at the same seat they sat at all those weeks ago when they first met. They talked for hours until a sound over the radio caught their attention. It was an all too familiar melody being sung by an all too familiar voice.

“Todd is this you!?”

Todd smiled. “It is. I got lucky enough to write one song with that melody you gave me. This is the only station that plays it, the local one. The owner is good friends with Patrick so I think he felt obligated to play it. It’s probably not even that good.”

Dirk beamed. “It’s amazing. What’s it called?”

“Circles in the Sand,” Todd answered.

They listened to the rest of the song in silence. By then, it was past midnight.

Todd pulled out his phone. “Look. It’s 527.”

Dirk smiled, only a little wider than a moment before. “Today’s the day you were supposed to get married. But you’re with me.”

“Today is the day I spend with the one I love. And I’m with you, Dirk.”

Dirk was already leaning in when he whispered, “yeah.”

As their lips connected, in sync this time, everything else fell into place. Instants, moments, and a flickering flame of light.

Flickering.

And then gone.

When they pulled away, the cafe was dark. The power went out.

“It’s the whole town. Everything is just... off.” Some lady from across the cafe said as she looked out the window.

Todd looked up at the clock that had stopped.

“Dirk, what was the question from Bart? The last sign?”

Dirk thought for a second, although he didn’t need to. He’d never forgets the signs in his life. “What does it look like when time stops?”

Todd pointed at the frozen clock. “That.”

Time had stopped when they kissed.

Any doubts that were in Dirk’s mind before we’re gone now. It was Todd. It was always Todd.

The only thing Dirk could think were words from Patrick Spring when he was talking about Catherine.

Dirk smiled. “It’s true.”

“What is?”

“Life is not the things that we do. It’s who we’re doing them with.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow oh wow! This is the first bang I've ever been apart of and it was totally amazing! Everyone apart of this is a wonderful person and I'm thankful for them all. Shout out to my beta, Spiritsgal on Tumblr, who kept me on track throughout this. And my artist, the wonderfully talented Marizetta on Tumblr, who hyped me up with her awesome drawing.  
> Also, go listen to the Fly By Night soundtrack, it's amazing and you'll cry.  
> Anyway, thanks for reading! This had been wonderful and I love you guys!


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